Why we named our nephew Ike Jr. - the unknown side of our father, Ike Sr.

Between Roosevelt and Churchill.

In the Versailles.

The family in the Hyde Park.

Following my last announcement about the birth of our nephew; Rafayel Iqbal Latif, nicknamed Ike we had a flurry of responses. One of my closest friends wrote;

"Zach chacha - congrats to all your family and especially Isha and Zain on the arrival of Rafayel.

I am sure he will do the Latif family proud and live up to his illustrious name sake."

This morning my brother Zain forwarded this email to our family writing, "I found this in my email...i hope little ike will one day have something similar written about him..."

I thought it is important to expose a side unknown about my father by reposting this tribute to him by his one of colleagues, which describes him the eccentricities and maverickism the best. Usually people have eulogies written about them when they have passed but my father has one mid-life (Inshallah he will have a long life).

Up close and personal-

Iqbal Latif – the man and the myth

It's been a long time since we had a marathon discussion that covered the entire spectrum of our lives. I've been working with you for so long that the office has become my home away from home, my work my household chores, and my bosses my surrogate family. And somehow one tends to take for granted all that you hold today. Yesterday was my birthday and it seemed befitting to mark my twenty years here with our no-holds barred discussion.

You know, I never got a real opportunity to tell you the kind of impact you made in my life and influenced my youth to evoke certain qualities any parent would be proud of, or any individual would be respectful of. Let me take a deep breath and embark upon this letter to tell my little story, and what I have come to know of you.

I was introduced to you when I was a mere 16-year old in the final year of my high school. My father struck up a friendship with you, because not only were you a dynamic "happening" young man at the time, but the fact that you were an "old soul," who shared many interests with the same passion and fervour. I know my dad enjoyed your company tremendously and always looked forward to your visits that lasted all night until the wee hours of the morning. Not just my dad, but my mother too was fascinated and you held them rapt with your opinions and knowledge. Even then, you were a fountain of novel ideas and held very strong beliefs sans prejudice. For a teenager like me, I was simply intimidated by proxy rather than any personal interaction. But I always recall feeling a sense of wonderment at the fact how one so young could be so comfortable in the company of another who was decades older. I learned much later that you were more in your realm with people who were far older and more experienced in the ways of the world.

Fast forward to the time I started working in a small company, where I was quite unhappy – overworked, underpaid and underappreciated. Do you remember when you gave me an annual report you drafted, which Mohammed had typed up, and you asked me to read and correct it? Your interest in my abilities at the time, I'd say, seemed quite mild and cursory at best. After that, you suggested I work with you, an offer I accepted with alacrity.

Skip to the part where I became a full-time employee. My first personal look into your fabric came when my ex-manager gave me hell for leaving his company for reasons we both know but won't get into. Having taken me under your wing, you took a firm stance to protect me to the extent of rupturing your friendship with a friend who was part of your clique back then. I can never forget that. Of course, that was only one of the first of many instances over the years that earned you my undying and unquestioning loyalty. Very recently, you fought for me and were ready to walk out and wind up the company for my sake when I had certain differences with our "superior." That is the kind of man Iqbal Latif is. A little crazy, but committed to people he believes in and cares for.

I was a mere girl with absolutely no academic qualifications, no experience, a real greenhorn, low on confidence precisely for these reasons. Any other boss would have lost patience from the word "go" at my ineptness and uncertainty. But here you were, time and time again, you'd buck me up with your own brand of trial-and-error training. Your constant encouragement and appreciation boosted my self-esteem and increasingly helped me become more sure-footed. Not that you would sit down and teach me the ropes, but guide and steer me with such subtlety that it was only when I'd reflect on your common sense logic and simplified breakdown of any issue, that I began to really understand and appreciate how you operated, who you were and are.

As I began to write this letter to you, I added a caption to it. Iqbal – the man and the myth. I have been riding the waves with you in both your personal and professional life. As a professional, there is no question about your brilliance. Your extraordinary foresight and ability to pick out winning horses is incomparable. That is why our group has grown and matured to unseen levels today. You saved this company from the brink of bankruptcy and extracted it from many a dicey situation at several points in time. The REDCO issue, wow! that was an incredible feat. One of the firsts of many firsts… There are plenty of business-savvy men around, plenty of brilliant minds walking God's green earth. But that's not the point, is it? The point is how you, Iqbal Latif, despite his knowledge of "self" and of his own potential, manages to keep his humility and simplicity, and walks through life's mazes without any fanfare.

Your dedication to your family, wife and children, siblings and in-laws, close friends and colleagues earn you the kind of accolades you deserve. I remember how much you put into ensuring your brother; your sisters, your brothers-in-law and sister-in-law get a head start on a fine future. If they have become what they are today, much of their success is attributed to you. I know that as I've had first hand experience as to what you did. Again, all this was done very subtly without trumpeting your efforts be it in cash or kind. Where your sons are concerned, I admire you and Nasrin on the way you raised them. While Nasrin has helped shape up their character, your contribution, in my opinion, broadened their mental horizons and honed their personalities without them realizing it. From what I know of you, and having met your boys, it is clear that your role as a father has been beyond that of being merely a parent, in that you introduced a novel idea of education, gave them liberties and independence to "be;" share thoughts and experiences on an equal level; give them the right to rebel and toe the line; instilled values and principles that you believe are an intrinsic part of your culture, tradition, and background. You taught and demonstrated that all human beings are to be treated as equal, without the barriers of caste and creed. You should be proud of their achievements and progress that began at a very tender age and accept the fact you played a very big part in what they have become today.

I come from a very demonstrative family where each lavishes his affection very freely on the other; a passing hug, frequent pecks on the cheek. For me, that was nothing out of the ordinary since I grew up in that environment. I noticed from the very beginning that you were not the same with your own family. I never put in much thought as to how much you felt for them, until Nasrin got very sick after her accident while she was pregnant. In that touch-and-go situation, your quiet desperation and worry on one hand, combined with the practicality of life where you went about conducting your business affairs in as normal a fashion as you could muster on the other, was nothing short of amazing. I also remember when you first learnt of Zain's juvenile diabetes and I spoke to you. That conversation and your heartbroken sobs that peppered it are indelibly etched in my mind. I can simply not forget how you overcame it in a relatively short time with your comforting practicality and acceptance of life in its absolute black-and-white form. And this is how you continue to be with every tragedy that strikes you.

In the last twenty years, despite having endured real traumatic experiences, not just the personal kind where you saw betrayals and duplicity from friends, but even in business, when you suffered huge losses because of the Kuwaiti invasion, or the Al -ayes drama, or the NIC debacle, or the Leca case, or the …..i fiasco, you never let it affect you in any negative manner, not your character, or your attitude, or your blind faith and trust in the basic goodness of people. You handled it all, with a panache and a shrug of your shoulder, rose every time you fell, and actually attributed a positive element to each occasion. You simply delved within yourself, questioned, assayed and became a better person, and at the risk of sounding shallow, more affluent. I know of nobody who has been able to achieve that.

One would think that you are this epitome of perfection if they ever read this. Hardly. My relationship with you has lasted too long a time for me not to see the imperfections. A real paradoxical creature you are. An incisive and shrewd mind with an almost child-like ingenuousness. A little gizmo and its workings would fascinate you where you would ask questions about its dynamics, but you are able to blow apart the contents of a non-proliferation treaty with informed opinions, or develop a thesis on the metaphysical nature of our existence, or redraft the government's 5-year budget on defence-spending, or write feelingly on the tragedies of the present world. The list simply goes on and on. And yet, behind all the genius is a bit of insanity, a bit of eccentricity, a lot of impatience, a quick temper, spiced up with a little self-opinionated arrogance, and perhaps a mite of pettiness. I recall a real slanging match between us nearly 18 years ago, right in the centre of the office, where you took offence to the fact that I had placed an inferior-quality telephone in your room which blew completely out of proportion! J In any event, I think, unfortunately, it gives people more comfort to latch on to these negative qualities about you to make themselves feel a little more superior. The fact that you don't have the patience to hear another person's story or opinion or be an attentive listener doesn't help matters. You come across as one who loves an audience, but cannot be an audience TO someone. Your brain is always on an overdrive, thinking faster and concluding a point before the talker has a chance to conclude the first part of his sentence. It is an annoying habit and an acquaintance would merely brush you off mentally since you appear to be quite dismissive of their thoughts. That is probably the reason why some people prefer to keep a distance from you. Of course, on knowing you better, one realizes that these are mere quirks of your character. The other interesting characteristic about you, which is a little-known fact, is that you have a very deceptive demeanour that people, men and WOMEN alike, tend to mistake you as a simpleton, one who could easily be taken for a ride. It is only when you rear your head when they try to take advantage of you that they get a lesson in reality. There are too many such instances I recall for me to pen them down. One ought never to underestimate you or write you off as a bumbling creature. In my opinion, I think portraying a persona like that gives you a one-upmanship over the unsuspecting and allows you to work on damage control well beforehand.

Iqbal, the untrue myth, is a character full of himself, arrogant and flamboyant, dismissive and careless, heartless and unfeeling. But even if this myth is popular, one would never doubt his intellectual éclat. So there IS a silver lining!

Having said that, the truth in its naked form is that Iqbal, the man, irrespective of his brilliant intelligence, intellect, and coffers J is a genuinely good human being: honest, full of integrity, philanthropic, loving and loyal to the core, a most reliable and faithful friend, completely dependable in his familial role as a husband, father, son, brother, toward his extended family and a friend of friend.

Yet, with your constant upward trajectory of growth, you retained your humbleness and never flaunted your successes. You continue to treat all your superiors, and your friends, with the same kind of respect without imposing your mental superiority or prowess over them. Till today, I see your struggle to pursue every course of self-improvement. I don't know anyone who is so critical of himself, or who analyzes his faults and failures, as he sees it, with such brutality. That is the man I know and respect. I have always said that I am lucky to have been educated by a walking institution. No academia would have been able to teach me what I have learnt from you; so profoundly complete. Your confidence in my abilities, when I myself wasn't sure about them, gave me the sense of responsibility I have today. The loyalty and commitment you showed towards my well-being has earned you mine. I learnt how not to let little successes get in the way of being a bigger and better person, and I owe that to you. It is hard to cover the kaleidoscope of your colorful being in a few lines. But I thank you from the bottom of my heart and soul for all that you continue to be.Ike

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